Today as I was driving down Encinitas Blvd. a thought came into my mind about mistakes. A friend had spent the morning and was telling me about her new job for an organization whose goal is, in part, encouraging risk taking in the arts. I had a hard time understanding how that would play out and why the organization put it that way, what did they mean?  And then it occurred to me that maybe we live in a world where a child is taught not to make mistakes. If I take a risk and make a mistake I will be foolish or worse. How often I hear adults tell me they can’t sing or they can’t draw based on early experiences of criticism or ‘mistakes’.

From a teaching point of view, isn’t a mistake  really a learning experience? Do we see life as a place of learning or a place of perfection?

If the goal is learning through experimentation then mistakes are almost welcomed. In science it is the hypothesis; a guess.

But if the goal is perfection, winning, beating the other guy, then mistakes become failure, and some become afraid to try.

When we set out to learn something, try something new, improve our skills or understanding isn’t there always risk involved? Risk that we may fail, in many different ways.  We all weigh the risk factor in attempting things. Thinking of my  students I know some weigh these risks more than others. But even learning to walk or talk requires risk taking.

And if we are in a position to guide children do we get angry or scold them if they make a mistake or do we let them know accidents are part of learning?  Do we scold or punish a child who drops a plate and breaks it. Well,  that probably depends on whether or not they were just plain careless , trying to break it, or just hoping they could help set the table.

In our schools, do we punish kids who make mistakes in their reading or math? Do we give them grades that say, ‘ You didn’t do very well?”. Or do we see that we , their teachers, haven’t found a way to help them master the subject ( if mastery is even the goal)?

In our homes and schools, don’t we want to be gentle and understanding? Can we not teach children how to fix a mistake  or that it may not even be a mistake, and at the same time give them more practice and try to help them succeed? When your little one is learning to walk you don’t put obstacles in the way and make it hard for them. All over the world you see the natural human instinct seems to be to get down on the child’s level and reach out your two arms encouraging the baby to walk to you.

Making mistakes and being scolded we learn shame and blame. Making mistakes and being helped to clean it up and try again encourages us to participate in kinder, more understanding world.

As for me, I make mistakes regularly, still. I am still learning and hope to until, well, I don’t really have a finite ending to that.

What do you think about mistakes?

Maria